Do you get your kids to do everything themselves? I believe in teaching responsibility, pride and confidence, and getting them to try something, even if they need a little help. This morning, though when the Kindergarten teacher commented that I was being the slave for my 4 year old, I had to take a moment to assess the situation.
I am not the most patient person and sometimes a little soft, and that is often where my problem lies. I also have to remind myself to slow down when I have time up my sleeve, as I tend to move at one pace through the day. I also believe, though, that children are children and need to learn age appropriate things. I think that this learning is best done at a time that is suitable to them and you.
When I am rushing around in the morning trying to make sure 3 people are ready to go out the door, I would rather do a task myself than pull a child away from the bathroom to do it. I often start loading up the car while the kids finish getting ready. I know time is crucial when I have to stop off at two separate schools, and then make it to work on time. When I know that my son is having a shaky week coping in his first semester ever at school, I will carry his bag over to his hook and hang his hat above it. This was exactly the scenario from this morning.
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Sometimes it is quicker and easier to do a task myself. I also get peace of mind knowing that something is done and in it's place.
It's not that I don't see the value of children doing things themselves. I do! And we practice and encourage this at home often. At home, we are not pushed for time and there is room to try things several times to get it right. If time permits, then I encourage the children to do as much as they can. I am such a believer in having a go.
So, while I did stop and assess this morning, I came to the conclusion that things were as they should be.
How do you manage your children and their learning?
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I constantly have the same issues. I have 3 kids and myself to get ready and off to their respective locations each morning and it is easier to do things myself. I do try and encourage them to do as much as possible but I only have so much time free and I confess that I'm not the most patient person when under the pump! It is something I want to work on though...I'll let you know how I go!
ReplyDeletePlease do Kristy. I need tips in the patience department.
DeleteMy girls fall to pieces if I push them too hard during busy times, so we work and learn at their pace. That might not always be as fast as their peers are at the stage the teacher wants, but it works for us. I think the negative self esteem from pushing them to hard to fast and basically setting them up for failure is far worse than taking it a little more slowly.
ReplyDeleteSo true Marita,
DeleteI get so sick of saying "hurry" and I'm sure my kids do too. Why put them under constant pressure?
I agree. I have 2 kids going to school, and 2 younger ones that I still need to get ready. I do tend to do a lot for them. But I find it better than running late and being all stressed out. I do make suggestions in less hectic times.
ReplyDeleteYep - that works for me too Melanie. I hate running late.
DeleteI really think this depends on the age and maturity of the child, as well as your own disposition and patience. My boys are 9 and 5 and while the older can do most things for themselves, I've been really slack with the younger one, continuing to help him with most things. Now that he is at school, I am making an effort to encourage him to help himself. Sometimes it takes longer and sometimes we are late. I'm thankful that I don't need to be anywhere in the morning, but sometimes when I do, I find the boys really helpful and self-motivated. Go figure!
ReplyDeleteThanks for linking up this week!