My theory is that boys and conventional toilets just don't mix. There, I
said it. It's out there. Who is going to back me up on this one?
My problem lies with the one boy in the household. I have heard similar stories from other Mums of boys, but I must admit that at the time I thought "how hard can it be?" Point and shoot, right?
I really don't think it is a matter of aim though, as I have seen offenders aim at other things with perfect precision and most boys will try writing their name while urinating at least once in their lives.
There is clearly a reason why public toilets are equipped with urinals for males or the simple 'wee here wall'.
So what is the problem? Possibly boredom and easily distracted? If you have any thoughts or advice I am happy to listen.
After several discussions with Master 4 about where the wee is meant to go, and the consequences of the wee going outside of the intended perimeter, I threw up my hands in despair and total frustration. I am so over sitting on a toilet seat with a dribble of urine on it, and little puddles beside the toilet on the floor. The sweet smell of wee is not my favourite fragrance.
There are many things I would personally like to control. Hubby would say this is just me being a control freak, but what is wrong with wanting things to follow the correct course and end with the right outcome?
At the beginning of the year when I wrote 2012 - Year of control, I had no idea I would then resort to writing about toilet habits and etiquette. Yet, here I am.
I have resorted to following Master 4 to the toilet. I stand within glare and warning reach while he does his deed. I have stopped just short of actually taking control of the offending body part myself. Although, I haven't totally dismissed at as the last option.
So, in my capacity of The Wee Police, I was one duty only yesterday, listening carefully for the correct sound of urine on porcelain. The second the sound changed tone, I belted out the order "In the toilet!" It's a wonder Master 4 doesn't startle at this point and spray me with it.
Master 4 re-aimed and finished his business. As he walked past me he shrugged his shoulders and said "Sorry Mum, I just lost control for a moment." Just like that I was left standing outside the toilet on my own, contemplating the news I had just been given.
The frustration gave way to humour as I pondered the enormous responsibility of controlling such wayward beast. I fought the urge to yell after him with "Both hands on the bat son".
God help us all when the hormones kick in.
My problem lies with the one boy in the household. I have heard similar stories from other Mums of boys, but I must admit that at the time I thought "how hard can it be?" Point and shoot, right?
I really don't think it is a matter of aim though, as I have seen offenders aim at other things with perfect precision and most boys will try writing their name while urinating at least once in their lives.
There is clearly a reason why public toilets are equipped with urinals for males or the simple 'wee here wall'.
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So what is the problem? Possibly boredom and easily distracted? If you have any thoughts or advice I am happy to listen.
After several discussions with Master 4 about where the wee is meant to go, and the consequences of the wee going outside of the intended perimeter, I threw up my hands in despair and total frustration. I am so over sitting on a toilet seat with a dribble of urine on it, and little puddles beside the toilet on the floor. The sweet smell of wee is not my favourite fragrance.
There are many things I would personally like to control. Hubby would say this is just me being a control freak, but what is wrong with wanting things to follow the correct course and end with the right outcome?
At the beginning of the year when I wrote 2012 - Year of control, I had no idea I would then resort to writing about toilet habits and etiquette. Yet, here I am.
I have resorted to following Master 4 to the toilet. I stand within glare and warning reach while he does his deed. I have stopped just short of actually taking control of the offending body part myself. Although, I haven't totally dismissed at as the last option.
So, in my capacity of The Wee Police, I was one duty only yesterday, listening carefully for the correct sound of urine on porcelain. The second the sound changed tone, I belted out the order "In the toilet!" It's a wonder Master 4 doesn't startle at this point and spray me with it.
Master 4 re-aimed and finished his business. As he walked past me he shrugged his shoulders and said "Sorry Mum, I just lost control for a moment." Just like that I was left standing outside the toilet on my own, contemplating the news I had just been given.
The frustration gave way to humour as I pondered the enormous responsibility of controlling such wayward beast. I fought the urge to yell after him with "Both hands on the bat son".
God help us all when the hormones kick in.
Posts
The problem is you Melissa Jane, husband is correct you are a control freak.
ReplyDeleteI am a trained nurse ,have three sons there was never a problem with the wee department.
I feel sorry for Master 4 leave him alone and he will figure it all out for himself.
Understand completely, but must say that my almost 4 y.o is pretty good most of the time. I just avoid going to the toilet in bare feet or socks! He also puts the seat up before he wees, so at least its dry when I sit down.
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