Coping With Anxiety And Adrenaline

Adrenaline is one of those amazing hormones that your body creates when you are scared, angry or excited. Your body makes it when it thinks you need it, like a boost of energy and confidence to get through something. Unfortunately, when you have Anxiety, your body may misinterpret the signs and create adrenaline when it is not needed. When adrenaline is released into the body, it quickens the heart beat, strengthens the force of the heart's contraction, and opens up the bronchioles in the lungs, among other effects.

Some people refer to some activities as "an adrenaline rush", and seek them for the buzz that it can help you feel. I remember the adrenaline rush of our wedding day and it kept me warm in my sleeveless gown well into the night. My husband also refers to adrenaline when people ask how he copes when attending accidents with SES.

These examples are fleeting in their longevity, and do not compare in any way to the adrenaline I felt through Anxiety.

I would be emotionally and mentally exhausted, and battling several other symptoms of Anxiety, but my body would still be ready to go.

I would go to sit down in the late afternoon, or prepare for bed in the evening, and my body would fight it, trying to tell me that it was ready to take on more. I would be laying down shaking all over, from my chin right down to my toes. As much as I tried to stop it, my teeth would chatter, but I was not cold.

It was what I termed Adrenaline Shakes, and to experience it is quite disconcerting.

I had started medication, but knowing that it would take weeks to take effect, I wanted to do whatever I could myself to aid in the journey to recovery.

I was doing two forms of exercise a day. During the day I would pop in my earphones, put my head down and would take a fast, lengthy walk. Between dinner and bedtime, I would do a workout that would eat into that build up of adrenaline, such as an hour of Kick Boxing.

I have found exercise to be a fundamental part of treating my Anxiety, for using up the adrenaline, but also to keep me fit and able to cope both physically and mentally.

Palpitations were a complication of too much adrenaline too. I had numerous episodes, both at home and in the presence of medical practitioners. I used breathing, relaxation and ice packs to the head and face to try to slow down my heart rate, but eventually I had to be prescribed a Beta Blocker to control the palpitations until my other medication became effective. After a couple of months I was able to come off the Beta Blocker.

I was also aware that if I could limit my Anxiety by any other means, it would reduce the amount of adrenaline I was building up. I actively sought any forms of relaxation like breathing, massage, listening to music, yoga and progressive muscle relaxation.

I would love to know how Adrenaline has impacted on you and your methods of coping?

Fire Ravaged Our Beautiful Region

We have travelled through the fire ravaged region in Tasmania's south for the first time. We do this route often to get to our fabulous holiday spot, but this time the view and the feelings they brought, were very sombre indeed. It has been two weeks since the fires started, so we knew this drive would be different, but were interested to see the extent of the damage first hand, having only seen news coverage and pictures on social media.  

After a kilometre or so into the devastated region, we had seen more than enough. Unfortunately the horrid scenery lasted nearly an hour, as the effect of the fire is so widespread, and the speed limit has been reduced due to the many area were repair is still ongoing on the sides of the road to the power lines, fences, guides posts and signage and burnt trees in danger of falling onto the road.  

The telltale signs of the fire started not far south of Sorell. There were many more animals housed in each paddock, where they had been brought to safety. Then came the singed paddocks and trees. This quickly elevated to burned treeline for as far as the eye could see.  There was the occasional remains of a home which could not avoid the fury of the fire. It was quite amazing to see the homes where the fire had gone right up to the door, yet, through massive efforts to save the home, or through sheer luck, the house is still standing, unscathed.

The story changed dramatically once we reached the township of Dunally. Home after home has been ravaged by the fire. The district school is gone, along with several other businesses. Many of these buildings were quite old, as is evident by the style of the chimneys, which are the only things still standing.

Our holiday spot was not reached by these fires, so this horrid vision is the only effect on us. We are very fortunate, compared to those whose homes have been lost, those who were trapped on the peninsula, those who fled to safety, those who lost power, and those who gave their time to help.

It was a horrible episode in Tasmania's history, but thankfully, no lives were lost as a direct result of these fires. Quite a miracle considering the ground covered and the buildings destroyed.

The slow procession of cars travelling to the Tasman Peninsula.

What is left of the Dunally Bakery

The hill behind Eagle Hawk Neck

Charged Double for texting with Smileys

What is the world coming to? I really shouldn't be so surprised, as I find out today that they give then they take away. Isn't that the world we are currently living in? Let me be more specific.

As sms and texting has become more popular, so too has the inclusion of the smiley face using either an app. or by using a sequence of punctuation, like commas and full stops, etc. Such as :-).
It is a cute way of ending your message, and adds a little emotion. Thus, they are also called emoticons.

It appears that the use of these little faces in your message actually can cost you twice as much when you send it. How rude!

Apparently by using certain symbols, like the bullet point for instance, the message is encoded differently and the length of your message allowed is reduced from 160 characters to 70. So a message of over 70 characters that includes any particular accents, punctuation or the popular smiley icons, will be charged as two messages.

When Kochie on Channel 7's Sunrise bought it to my attention this morning as I ate my breakkie, I nearly fell off my chair in shock. A reported actually tried it and confirmed it had been charged twice. Ironically, he was reporting outside the Apple store for the launch of the iPhone 5.

So, for me, my texting will now be emotion free. I will however, be blowing a big raspberry to the technical world, with satisfaction, each time I now send my messages.

Unbearable Lightness Book Review

I love immersing myself in a good book. Admittedly, since becoming a parent I find it harder to block the world out ans really sink my teeth into a story. So, when I do manage to do this, I need to share it. I know I am committed to the story when I find myself thinking about the character throughout my day, and thinking about their situation.

Unbearable Lightness, written by Portia de Rossi is her own story to tell. The book focuses on her acting career, her sexuality and her eating disorder that dominated her life. It is a story of real struggle and contradiction. Here was a woman who wanted to be a model and actor, yet was uncomfortable with the attention. A woman, who had admiration and could see the beauty in others, but not herself. A story of a woman battling a mental disorder, while denying it existed.

I remember Portia de Rossi's entry to my life and the television series, Ally McBeal as Nelly, and I joined others in watching this natural beauty work her character with sex appeal, intelligence and confidence. I remember thinking how cool this girl from Australia was, joining the Hollywood scene and living her dream. In the book, Portia gives her own recollection of starting on Ally McBeal, which couldn't have been more different to what I imagined. As she describes her workday, her joy and frustrations, her high and lows, I marvelled at her honesty and the detail she offers to help you enter and understand her world.

Her anorexia and bulimia dominated her life for 20 years, and I really felt the emotion and dominance of her mental illness. I was continually shocked at the practices that she thought were normal, the thought process of the disorder, the ever-shocking calories intake(or lack thereof), and the numbers on the scales. 

The last chapters of the book describe her recovery and finding happiness with her wife, Ellen Degeneres. Some may say this section has been brushed over, but I felt she wanted the struggle with her disorder and sexuality to remain bold and clear.

Tug of war - children and animals

As a parent, I try really hard to remember what it was like as a child. It can be so easy to just dictate and lay down the rules, and say "And that's that." With a little step back and some consideration, it helps me to empathise with the children and communicate better.

We are having a little tug of war within the family at the moment. We have our trusty female Labrador Gypsy who has been with us for 6 years now, since she was a pup. Miss 8 and Master 4 love animals. Miss 8 in particular has had her eyes opened to the world of pets lately, with her teacher breeding Guinea Pigs and kindly bringing them in to the class every couple of weeks. It is great for the kids, as they have free contact with some animals they can handle and learn about. On the downside, each time the Guinea Pigs come to visit, it renews Miss 8's pleas for another pet.

Personally, I am not against having another pet in the family. Before making any additions though, we need to consider the dynamics of our house and family. I like to think these things through to consider all the pros and cons. Hubby, on the other hand likes a pet to be useful and sees any addition as only more work for us.

Miss 8 has been pleading her case with great enthusiasm, and has hit the subject from several angles. Once she gets an idea in her head, she is quite adamant. Miss 8 is a romantic at heart though, and tends to see the cute fluffy side of things, and not so much of the yucky, problematic side.

So, with an open mind, I said we should sit down and discuss this.

M8: I can buy a Guinea Pig from my teacher for only $10. Can I pleeaase have a Guinea Pig.
Mum: It may be only $10, but then it needs a home, needs looking after and feeding ....
M8: Yeah, but Mum it can live in my room and I will look after it.
Dad: I don't think a Guinea Pig is a good idea. Who will look after it when we go on holiday or away for the weekend?
M8:Well if I can't have a Guinea Pig I want a Parrot.
Mum:Hang on, we need to consider the mess that a bird makes. They may not need as much attention as other pets, but birds do tend to like to flick their food around a bit. It definitely can't live in your room, so where could we put it?
Dad: They are messy.
Mum:Could it live under the carport?
Dad: We need to remember how cold it gets here.
Mum:We also need to consider that we have a dog, and they may not mix.

The conversation lasted quite a while, and took many different turns and twists.
We tried to explain that there were many things to consider before getting another pet. We live in a small house, Master 4 is very full on, and hands on. We already have a dog. We go away quite a bit through the year. We need to consider all aspects of the pets' needs and the affect on the family.

All Miss 8 could hear was "No." Which is not what we were saying at all.

Miss 8 is not just a romantic at heart, but an emotional child too.

In the end I explained that we needed to consider the matter a little longer. I want her to be happy, and I believe that pets are great. I had several as a child, but there were no huge attachments.  Miss 8 is a completely different person and bonds with animals quickly. We also wanted to consider the rest of the family, because we are a team - we don't please one person to the detriment of everyone else. I also explained to Miss 8 that it would mean adding to her chores, of which she is already committed to cleaning her room once a week and helping to feed Gypsy through the week. She is like most children and forgets or tries to avoid her chores on occasion.

so, our dilemma continues.

I can see the joy she would get out of another pet.

The housing of the pet and tending to it's needs are an issue.

I will continue to look at options ... she will continue to beg, plead and cry to win her case.

Do you have any suggestions? I would love to hear your point of view? 
Do you have any positive or negative stories on pets?

Some Days We Tread Lightly

He begged me. "I don't want to go".
He kicked his shoes off as soon as I put them on.
He refused to seat in his booster to be buckled in.
He pouted all the way there.
He dragged his feet down the path toward the door.

Once inside, I tried to steer him through his normal routine of finding his name to put on the board, and hanging his bag under his photo. 
We greeted the teacher.
Uh oh ... relief teacher.
He took a step back from the unfamiliar face.
Luckily the teacher aide rushed in. "What would you like to start with today? How about you join in playing with the trains?"

He never took his eyes off me, so I sat down near the train tracks. He slowly lowered himself to the floor next to me.
He surveyed the other boys playing with the trains and the track they had already created. He spied a train not being used. As he reached for it, a little boy grabbed a piece of track and whacked it across his hand "No!"
He was instantly in my lap, his little arms around my neck. He sobbed for a good ten minutes.

He is not usually clingy. He is usually eager to join in. Not today.

Today he is fragile. Today he wants his Mum. Today he doesn't want to be a big boy at Kindergarten.

The teacher's aide came to my rescue again with a game with Dragon's on it. This woman is worth her weight in gold.
Other boys crowded around and wanted to play too.
He slowly sat in the chair pulled out for him.
He concentrated on the games for a while, and I saw his shoulders relax.
The teacher's aide gave me a nod as I stood.
He looked up as I closed the door behind me.
His eyes looked longingly into mine, but he stayed in his chair as I smiled and waved through the window.

My heart is heavy as I head along the path to the gate.

Black, white and shades of grey

Grumpy, 

miserable, 

unsatisfied, 

negative, 

emotional

argumentative.

image source

Some days there are little black clouds hanging over the heads of my children.

If I said something was black, they would argue it was white. 

Their favourite meal is now disgusting.

None of their usual DVDs, games, or toys will do.

If I was to make a drink, there would be tears and tantrums because there is no straw.

On days like this my jaw aches from the constant clenching.

All you can do is take cover and wait for the wind to blow the clouds away.

How do you cope with days like this?

Please tell me I am not alone.

Grateful for .... community spirit

They came in droves, some already carrying their lit candles. Many were arm in arm.
Like moths to a flame the friends and family of Taylor Lacey descended upon the rivers' edge under the bridge where Taylor was last seen 1 week ago.

I stood in amazement, turning in circles, trying to take in the magnitude of the moment.

So many people in one place to pay their respects to this teenager, and I'm talking hundreds. They diligently waited for their turn to sit their candle on the rivers' edge or place it in the water to float down. Flowers were also floating in the water, or placed between the candles.

The sight was magnificent.

Just as magnificent was the atmosphere created by these people who were not only there for Taylor, but for each other. Tears flowed freely and they comforted each other. The respect and the harmony I felt standing amongst these people put a lump in my throat.

After placing their candles, many chose to stand on the bridge and take in the view. From below, the sight of the people lining the bridge from end to end and several deep was amazing.

The SES volunteers, of which I was one, wanted to be present, not only to pay our respects for the teen for whom tedious searches had been in place for the last week, but to create a safe environment.  We need not have worried. The event had been organised on Facebook and had grown by word of mouth to show over 900 attending. Such a big crowd, full of emotion might cause concern. Tonight, the crowd was very respectful of those around them, and showed great caution close to the river. It was still an honour to be present.

I hope the gathering was helpful to the people who attended, and those who organised it.  It was a beautiful way to remember somebody. My heart goes out to all who are missing Taylor Lacey.

The candle vigil on the banks of the Derwent River (photo by NN News - click here to see their article)