What Does Your Ideal Life Look Like and Are You Living It?

 Are you living your ideal life? We all imagine what our lives will look like. Notice that I said "Ideal", not perfect .... be realistic. This is not the time to say "No, my prince charming did not come on a horse and swoop me off to his Castle". We are not living in a fairytale! So, when you look at the aspects of your life, right now, would you say that it is ideal?

Your definition of ideal should not involve comparing yourself or your life to others'. Ideal should involve your feelings and what you rate as important for you. An ideal life should be about all the pieces of the puzzle fitting neatly together. Ideal should feel like everything is balanced, because you have worked out what is most important to you and you have let go of things you don't rate. 

If we were to break down the areas of our lives they may include our home, our schedule, our job, our friends, our financial situation, our kids, how we parent, our attitude, our relationships, our fitness, our health, the way we deal with situations, our contribution to our community and the world ... The list could be quite long, but what matters for one may not even appear on someone else's list.

Life moves fast and we don't always have control over the way things go, but we often have choices. As we grow, our ways of looking at things often change, as our idea of ideal can change too. 

That's OK. 

What we think is an ideal life as a child, or teen, or young adult, may be very different to our idea of ideal when we have experienced life and have some knowledge of the world. Definitions change!

When you look at all of the aspects of your life, right now, how does reality compare to your ideal, imagined life?

Which bits are close? 

Which bits are vastly different?

Why are there differences? 

Do you want to reach your ideal?

What do you have to do to make that happen?

Have you sacrificed some areas of your life to build another? 

For me?

           I know that there are some aspects of my life that aren't necessarily ideal, yet they are reasonable. I can cope with the stage they are at. 

          There are a few areas that I have pondered over and toyed with most of my life. Trying to get them to a stage of "reasonable" is a struggle, with the changes within life, myself and the world always tilting the table one way or another. These areas will probably be a work in progress for years to come. 

          There are a couple of areas that have just fallen into place over time, with little effort, and continue to be easy. I dare not mess with these, and ask no questions and count my blessings.

           Mostly, I have a tendency to plod along, being swept down the stream of life and doing the best to not hit my head on the boulders on the way. Occasionally I stand back to look things over, like I am doing right now. I believe that nearly anything can be improved, so of course, there are always a few things that I note are not, in fact, ideal in my life, and that its time to get to work and change them.

I think that having an ideal(not prefect!) image of our lives is healthy. Like dreams, it gives us something to aim for. As long as the the image is realistic and achievable, why should our lives be less than ideal?

Getting In Touch With My Spirit

I have long had a fascination and interest in spirit, both the spirit of others and my own. Not everyone's cup of tea, I know. I am a huge believer that there is a need to get in touch with your spirit and that you can learn so much from the spirits around us, both living and in the past. So it has been a wonderful time for me in finding a great psychic who has created an online program to not only guide you on your own journey, but to connect you to others.

Julianna lives in Queensland in Australia, and has a huge portfolio with her psychic connection, working with Australian Police, businesses and individuals, appearing on radio and national television. Her partner in crime and business is Nicole who specialises in Communication, Branding and Marketing. Together they have formed Psychic Julianna TV to bring together a program to share with the public.

Psychic Julianna TV brings together a great community of people with a wide range of talents and knowledge.

They discuss current events, sex & relationship, Feng Shui, body image, men's topics, meditation and healing, emotional and physical health, past lives, paranormal and supernatural, spiritual guidance, mindset and personal development, psychic reading and Tarot. The topics really are broad and interesting and there is something for everyone.

Personally, I enjoy learning a broad range of topics and believe that knowledge is power.

I have also asked many questions and been enlightened regarding my relationship with those around me, and even insights into my own behaviour and personality.

I know that not everyone has the same beliefs in spirit and even self-development, but for me, this has been insightful, entertaining and a great way to access great information.

If you are interested, hop over to the website, the Facebook page or even catch some previous shows on You tube. 

I would love to know your views on seeking guidance with self development and spirit, and respect your opinion by not passing judgement.

Disclaimer: This post is based on my own opinion and is in no way sponsored.

The Week Of Ten

Do you notice when numbers keep popping up? Well this week it is ten for me. I like the significance of numbers, and tend to marvel when they keep popping up. It is like life is trying to point out important things to me.
This year was my tenth Mother's Day, as a Mum. The 10 years have absolutely flown by, and I am in constant amazement when I look at my children, as I swear it was only yesterday that they were crawling and gibbering baby-talk. Now, my daughter is getting closer to my height and stealing my shoes, which no longer slop around on her feet, but fit perfectly. My son long ago outgrew his baby curls and exceeds my energy levels in all forms of play.
In other TEN news, I was told in the same week at my blood donation appointment, that this was my tenth donation. Not a huge number, yet .... given that each donation potentially helps three people, I am more than ecstatic to have reached out to thirty people in their time of need. I find my appointments at The Red Cross Donation Centre in Hobart every three months to have little impact on my time. In fact, given that it takes about 10 minutes to fill a bag, and that I am treated to a chocolate milk and a snack afterward by the awesome staff, the appointment feels more like a morning tea with friends.
Lastly, I am posting this on the tenth. A little ironic?
I have been struggling lately to put my words down into a post worth reading. Not that I have nothing to say .... that will be the day! I have been busy with work and home life, and found the need to quiet my mind when I get a moment. I tend to go through phases of needing to quiet the inner chatter.
Have you noticed any numbers recurring in your life lately?

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Lucky I love puzzles

I love a good puzzle. Which is quite lucky really - given that parenting involves a lot of puzzle work.

I love a good Word Search, Crosswords, Sudoku, Maze, Who Done It mysteries and even untangling things. My children like to give me a good puzzle occasionally too. They test my brain and skill just as much as any puzzle in any book. Can you relate?

My children often say to me 

"Mum, you know yesterday, when we went to that park, and we saw that bird? I climbed on that big climbing thing. Can we go there again Mum?"

So to decipher this, I have to know that yesterday is hardly ever yesterday, but can be quite some time ago. 

I then have to flip through the pictures in my head of every park we have ever visited, and single out a memory of a bird. 

I then need to cross check in my memory if the park has a big climbing thing. 

Once I have worked through this process, I can answer the question.

We are always searching for things too like keys, remote control, favourite jeans, etc.

Then you have the joy of living in a small house and the need to organise rooms to fit everything in. Just when you think you have a solution, the kids change their minds and want the bed on the other wall.

I also play detective. Following the clues, deciphering the evidence, and analysing the story to discover the truth.

Lastly, there is the quick thinking involved in explaining complex things in life; the manipulation of words, and the tricky structure of the conversation to suit their growing minds.

Luckily, I like a good puzzle ... as long as my energy levels can keep up.

Understanding What Causes Anxiety

I often replay a conversation over and over in my head. It was with a GP, and I was being treated for an Anxiety Attack. "What are you worrying about?", "What is causing your Anxiety?" She asked. I tried to think of an answer, but it wasn't that simple.

I have learned quite a bit since that day. The following may not be everyone's experience, but it is true for me.

I now know that General Anxiety, which is the form of anxiety from which I suffer, is not caused by one worry.

Instead of one worry, the body collects every little worry, every stressful moment, every tense movement and bundles them together until the body explodes under the pressure. This is especially the case if you have not dealt with the worries and tried to push them to the side, or you have not tried to help your body rid the tension from your muscles.

I can understand that those not suffering from Anxiety, or who have no knowledge of it's workings, could think of it in such simple terms as the GP did on that day.

For me though, her comment just doubled my stress as I tried to answer it from her simple outlook.

Anxiety is a complex condition, as is evident from the multitude of treatments that can be used and is often needed to combat the disease from all angles. Each person's anxiety, and how it effects them is also unique.

I hope that the GP has had more experience with Anxiety, and has been able to learn more about the subject, as I have done, to assist her in understanding what the next anxiety patient is dealing with.

The Real Reason For Not Doing It Is You

There comes a time in life when you have to admit the truth. There is only so long that you can blame others, or reel off excuses. Life has a way of yelling STOP!!!

So many people, including me, think there is an easier or quicker way to achieving something.

When you break it down, some things just take hard work and a commitment.

This was definitely the case for me and weight loss.

I found a million excuses.

There were so many other things I would rather do.

I have no time.

I'm not prepared.

In the end, you either get it, or you don't.

Luckily, for me, I admitted the truth before everything crumbled or came to an end.

Ask yourself ....

How badly do you want something?

What will happen if you keep waiting for a quick fix solution?

What will happen if you DO knuckle down and succeed?

What is your reason for self-sabotage?

It is so much easier to go on doing the same old routine.

Following our dreams is hard.

Change is hard.

Nothing worth doing is easy!!

That's why the feeling of achievement is so good.

That's why the rewards pay so well.

Are You Centred and Balanced?

Isn't it funny how we go about our lives, never really examining how we go about things unless something goes wrong. I know the saying "why fix it if it's not broken", which is often true. I also like the saying "if you do something, then do it well" which is why my trainer introduced a new app. recently to measure posture.

My awesome trainer, Sherri loves to look at things from every angle. Her business, Energy Health Concepts, has earned itself a great reputation because of this approach.

Sherri has been excitedly trying this posture app. PostureScreen Mobile (available through itunes and Google Play) with clients which requires two photos, a front view and side view (neither of my photos will appear on the blog to save the mental health of my readers).

From here, some key points are marked over the body which allows the app. to measure your posture. It also goes on to recommend exercise and techniques based on the findings.

Apparently I am a typical office worker/computer user. I hold my head and shoulders too far forward. This may not be causing problems yet, but with knowledge and some techniques to correct this, hopefully it never will.

My front view showed that I naturally shift to the left, from my pelvis up to my head, although my stance doesn't tilt either way.

Now that I am aware of this I have made some changes at my desk, and set a timer to remind me to do a few office friendly exercises every hour. The timer means that I am constantly reminded to check how I am sitting as well.

Retraining yourself is hard!

Are you conscious of your posture? Has any bad habits with your posture caused you grief?

Silence is golden, and not offensive

I was going about my business this morning, folding laundry, tidying, cleaning up the kitchen. All the while the TV was chatting away in the background. Every now and then, the TV caught my attention, and it made me wonder how some people get through day after day at home.

Do you faff around or fluff around?

This whole post was going to be how I am the Queen of wasting time. I am always "fluffing around". Doing a lot of nothing (with an ever growing list of things to do). No, no, not blogging ... this is so not time wasting!

I thought it would be good to Google "fluffing around". Google questioned what I was looking for? Can you believe it? It had supplied a stack of exerts that had used "fluffing around"exactly as I do; as a term for time-wasting. Yet, Google wanted to know whether I meant "faffing around"? No, I don't faff .... do I?

So I decided to look up the definitions of the two - Fluffing and Faffing.

Apparently I do faff around! So, how did faffing turn into fluffing? Well, in my opinion faffing is a ridiculous word that I don't even feel comfortable using in a sentence. I would much rather be fluffing .....or would I?

Check out the definitions below, (I have removed the extra descriptions in the original text, as I'm sure most people can figure this out without being too graphic) and think of them the next time you think you've been fluffing around.

I will definitely be faffing from now on.

The definition for faffing according to the Urban Dictionary is

       thesaurus for faffing:

1.	faffing
	Time wasting/feckin' around Stop faffing around and do the dishes! by Gordon Apr 2, 2003
2.	faffing
	to aimlessly waste time doing useless tasks stop faffing around and come to bed my love by snuffles Oct 16, 2004
3.	faffing
	wasting time by doing absolutely nothing Dom: What's the worst thing about sharing a tour bus with me? Matt: All your faffing about. Your electric toothbrush and mouthwash just wind me up. For one, it reminds me how unclean I am.   thesaurus for fluffing: 1. fluffing A technique used in most pornographic films today. When the male star has to get "aroused" for the camera he is fluffed beforehand. by hard_virus Jun 5, 2005  2. Fluffing The act of adjusting ones testicles due to stickiness, sweatyness or discomfort. Can also be described as "Fluffng the pillows." I spent 2 and half minuets fluffing my pillows after the basketball game. by Col.Blumpkin Mar 15, 2010  3. fluffing The act of increasing your friends' self-esteem by complimenting him or flirting with him, even if you have no real interest in dating him. Don't worry about me and Eric, I was just fluffing him up.

Parenting - Jekyll and Hyde style

Parenting is SO MUCH HARDER than I thought it was going to be.
I am one of those women who, from an early age, could only see my future with children in it. For much of my life I was surrounded by "little"family members, and can be seen in several photos with cousins propped on my hip.

When I look at my parenting style I can't say I lean definately one way or the other. And I look at other parents and think you can't be their friend all the time" or "they are going to end up hating you for your harsh treatment". So really, I don't necessarily sit in the middle, but swing slightly like a pendulum (sometimes with a child clinging at the bottom).

I don't always get the timing right and it all depends on the dynamics of the moment (what sort of day have I had, how many of my buttons have already been pushed, am I in public, have a got parenting back-up).

But my plan is to assess the child and the moment and hopefully choose a plan of suitable action.

It's just like everything else in life though - you can deal with the same thing in several ways. And the way you choose will influence the outcome.

I am also a product of the way I was brought up (even though we always say I am not going to do that like my mum/dad). And it's funny to hear myself saying some of the phrases I hated to hear. At least NOW I have an appreciation for WHY it was being said. Better late than nerver!

D day - and the winner is?

Gasp! Shock! Horror!    No - I think it's going to be ok.

This was me this afternoon when I was away from the house and realised I hadn't taken my medication this morning. My mind went into a small meltdown, then started racing through thoughts at 100 miles an hour. Crap. Crap. Crap.
What do I do - What can I do?

Then I stopped myself. Take a breathe. Get a grip.
I tried hard not to do a full self-analysis which is what I would do 20 times a day at the height of my anxiety. I'm fine - I know this. I don't need to analyse.

It's the day I have dredded since going back on anti-anxiety medication in March. I knew it would happen, eventually. I often thought about what I would do when it did happen. I have gone to work just to turn back countless times, sometimes a good distance along the road because I had forgotten to take my tablets.

So, what was I going to do today?
In the many times I had gone over this in my head, I had finally decided that, given that the medication had taken over 4 weeks to take full effect in my system, that missing one dose might not make a HUGE difference. Also, if I had been late an hour or two taking the tablets I probably would have gone home to take them. But, given that we are into the afternoon now and I usually take them when I get up, added to the fact that I am heading away from home and on foot with a friend - nope, I missed today's dose. That's all there is to it. No biggie - right. I hadn't broken into a sweat, the world hadn't rushed in at my, my vision was clear, my heart wasn't jumping out of my chest, my breathing was regular. Woo hoo - a win for me!

image source

To come to this conclusion quite quickly was a big moment for me. The fact that I had completely forgotten about my tablets until the afternoon was also an indication that I am doing so much better now than at the beginning of the year. There were days, weeks, months when my anxiety dominated my life and everything I did - or couldn't do as the case was.

Now, I was doing so much better. Don't get me wrong, this is not the time to wean myself off the tablets or (God forbid) stop taking them. My medication had brought me back to feeling a little like me again, and they helped me function everyday. I quite like the way I feel these days and am in no hurry to test the waters and to start feeling anything less. Today, I had gone a step toward the fact that I might be on medication to get through life right now, but there was a lot of effort I was contributing too.